Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Short and sweet!

Stepped on the scale this morning and was happily surprised that it said 179.2. So, since Monday morning I have lost 2.8 lbs. It's probably mostly water weight, but I don't care! It's motivation. I skipped spin class last night, but I'm going to Zumba again tonight. I'm feeling good. I've drank only water for the last three days and it feels amazing! I may get some of those powder packets to add to bottles of water, in case I start craving something with flavor. Only 7.2 more pounds to go to reach my Austin goal weight!

Hope you all have a fabulous Hump Day! The week is half way over :)

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Another stupid ex!

Ok, so do you remember when I talked about my old high school sweetheart? Who's stupidly jumping into a marriage really fast? If you missed that you can read it HERE. Although, this post doesn't exactly have anything to do with him, particularly, is it about another ex being stupid.

Bear with me. This post may be all over the place.
Ok, a little background on my last relationship before T.

 C, was in the military. We were together for 10 months and I honestly thought he was the man I would marry. I was sure that he was my soulmate. And I'd never even believed in that before him. Most of our relationship was long distance, so that was incredibly hard. During our relationship, he went from Florida to Japan and then to Guam. I think the time apart made us more passionate for each other, but he ended up cheating. We tried for a couple months to work on things, but having trust issues with a boyfriend that was thousands of miles away proved to be too difficult.

We broke up the day after Christmas, last year. We decided to somewhat keep in touch since there was no blow-out fight when we broke up. We both had just agreed things were not working. So we stayed friends on facebook just to keep updated with each other's lives.

4 days ago I see a fb post about him having "A BOY!". I'm like what? I continue to read and he met a girl in March. She got pregnant in March (she's 14 weeks pregnant), and they're planning on getting married. I felt sick to my stomach when I read this. Then, the anger started to hit me. I was ready to marry this man just 6 months ago. I feel like I don't even know him. I promptly deleted him from my friends list on facebook. I don't need to see that shit! It just hurts me.

So, two of my past serious exes are getting married/having a baby. I feel like a giant loser. I still live with my parents. Now, I know neither of them were/are right for me. But, it still hurts. And I'm very happy with T. But geez both of them planning on marriage after 3 months?!?! Tyler and I have been dating for 3 months and haven't even said "I love you" yet. I mean, I'm grateful that we aren't rushing things, but it makes me feel like I'm way behind in life or something. Idk, I feel like I can't explain it right.

Ugh sorry for the vent session but I was in complete shock!

Monday, June 27, 2011

Whew went missing for a bit!

Hope all of you had a wonderful weekend! Mine was pretty good! Comedy show on Friday, which ended up being for kids and adults, so that was a little disappointing. I'm sorry but the dirty stuff is what makes me laugh the most. Saturday, went with the boy to get his next tattoo. Then Sunday, went to lunch and the pool with the girls. I got really burnt. I'm bad about sunscreen. Even my ears are red.

I am sooooooo looking forward to this weekend! July 4th and I'm off on Monday (which I'm sure most people in the U.S. are). I don't think I really have plans for the weekend yet. I guess just wait and see what comes up.

I've gotten back in the gym. Not near as much as I really need to, but this week that changes. I have right at 6 months to lose ATLEAST 30 pounds for my sister's wedding (that I am a bridesmaid in). I'm contemplating whether to go back to Weight Watcher's meetings again. I know how to do the program, and I know it works. But going to the meetings and having to weigh in and have my weight written down somehow helped motivate me more. I've been trying to do WW for the last couple months and just can't seem to stay on track. I started today again, and tonight I'm going to zumba class. Tomorrow, is spin class, and then zumba again on Wednesday. I also want to take my measurements this time around. That way, even if I'm not seeing big results on the scale, I may see results in inches.

This is it.
No more back and forth.
No more, "I'll start on Monday."
I've been saying this for months and just can't seem to stick to it.

Somtimes, I think I make goals that are too far away, and maybe too big.
So, yes, I do want to lose 30-45 pounds by January. But, I want to make small goals that are sooner so that I can celebrate small goals and keep my motivation going.

So, I am about to tell you my weight... I'm nervous and the number I'm about to type makes me cringe, because it's the most I've ever weighed. In my whole life.

182. That's what I weigh.

I'm going to Austin in 3 weeks and 4 days. So my small goal is to lose 10 pounds by then. It's totally doable, as long as I stay focused.

If anyone has little tips on how you stay motivated in your diet and exercise, please share!!!

I also just want to feel and look better. Especially, naked lol. I don't feel sexy when we have sex and it's not dark. I want to feel comfortable and sexy again. And the thing is, T and I have only been dating for 3 months, so he's never seen me thinner and fitter. Which, in a way makes me feel good, that he started dating me at this weight. But, it also makes me want to look sexy for him. I'm not saying I want to lose weight for him at all. This is for me! But I do want to feel like I deserve to be desired when I'm with him, if that makes sense.

So there we go.

Long term goal- to weigh between 140-152 by January 2012

Short term goal- to weigh 172 or less by July 22nd

I'm also going to plan on rewarding myself with maybe buying an outfit, getting my nails done, or something like that. I've used food as a reward my whole life and it's time to change.

I hope you all have a fantastic Monday!

Thursday, June 9, 2011

I heart Target!

So, I went to Target yesterday, to look at jeans. Unfortunately, the cute jeans I have are a bit tight right now. And I decided it's better to buy the bigger size, that we all cringe when we realize we fit into, because why wear the ones that are too tight and look awful?

I've never done an "outfit post" but here goes nothing! I have to share this cute outfit that I got for only $50.

I am in LOVE with these shoes!

Denim crop capris

Ignore the weird face I'm making!
Grey and White Henley tee
I was in my work bathroom haha

Shirt- $15
Jean capris- $15
Flats- $20

I was excited! :)

Ok, now I have a fun personality test for you to take! It's really just for fun, but I have to say mine fits me to a T! Just a few questions, so it doesn't take long! CLICK HERE to take it. Post your results in a comment, if you like. I'm curious to see if anyone else's is as accurate as mine.

Here are my results:

Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.
The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.
Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.
The right job for you:
You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.
How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.
What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.
Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

Hope you all have a wonderful Thursday! It's almost the weekend! Yay!

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Update on... Lots of things

Update #1 The Boy:

Alright, well this last weekend, I was planning on finally asking T if we are exclusively dating or not. Especially, since we were going to be drinking. You know, a liitle liquid courage. Well, it didn't end up happening. There just wasn't a time where we were really alone. So, I decided yesterday to just ask him in a text, since we only see each other on the weekends. I was pretty matter-of-fact about it, or atleast I tried to be.  So, I'm going to paraphrase our text convo.

Me: "So, I've been meaning to ask you, there just hasn't been a good time. Are we exclusively dating?"

T: "I'm not good with titles, but I've been telling people for a month that I have a gf...."

So the whole "not good with titles" thing confuses me. Either we're together or not, you know?
So, then he goes on to tell me all the things he's not happy about in his life, and that he feels like he takes for granted what a genuine person I am,etc. At this point I'm thinking, is this a nice way to break up with me before I even thought we were together? But then he said he was just explaining that he has a lot he's stressed about right now that's making him not happy. So, as a result, this conversation was a bit disappointing to me. I was hoping to remember something a little happier about when we decided that we're together. Although, I'm a hopeless romantic, and always have high hopes for things like this. I told my two best friends about all this, and was told that I need to guard my heart. I do seem to fall fast for guys, especially when they're as sweet as he is. But, I'm taking their advice and going to take a step back. Things only get more complicated as you get older! I don't want to waste my time either, if it's not going anywhere serious. If anyone has any advice on this, I'd be more than happy to hear what you have to say!

Update #2 Workout Plans:

My friends and I have decided not to do the second summer session of bootcamp. I decided not to for a couple reasons. It's $100, and money is tight for me right now, and also the constant running is not good for my knees. So, instead, we've decided to get gym memberships together, that way we'll actually go! Plus, it's only $10 a month, and there are a lot of classes. I can't wait to try their yoga class. Oh how I've missed yoga! If you've never gone to a class, you're missing out! It's so relaxing, yet you still sweat and get a great workout. I'm going to sign up today with Kristena. I'm actually excited! I've already gained some muscle, now I'm ready to lose the pounds.

Update #3 My Eyelash Extensions:

So, like I said they were only $20 and I love them! It's been a week today, and they still look pretty darn good. I'm curious to see how funny they look when they start to fall off though. They were perfect for our camping weekend. I didn't really wear makeup, yet I looked like I had it on. Awesome!
Here's a pic, the day I got them:

Happy Thursday!!!

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Our camping trip pictures!

Hope everyone had a great Memorial Day weekend!
Don't have a lot of time today, so this post is purely pictures from my weekend.

Our toilet for the weekend!

Making my kickass cheese dip! Recipe will be posted soon!

The last morning- 2 days no shower! lol

T and Cash on the way home